Emotional Eating--The Real Holiday Stressor

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Emotional eating goes out the window with holiday stress. And so does losing weight. But the real holiday stress is not the rushing around (not that there isn't any of that) but it's the uncertainty of all your plans working out for the season.

Sure there is the hurridiness, the pressure to get something done, and the anticipation, but aside from all that there is uncertainty. Uncertainty that all your plans will work out well and everyone including you will be happy as a result of all that you are doing. Uncertainty that you'll get the right gifts--uncertainty that you'll project a great image at the company Christmas party--uncertainty that you'll even find the gifts you're looking for. Uncertainty as to how you'll pay for them or what you can afford. Uncertainty as to whether you remembered everything you had on your "to do" list. Uncertainty as to whether all your guests will show up or get along and behave.

Unlike hurridness, frustration, anticipation, and the pressure (or anxiety) to get something done that are fleeting feelings, uncertainty is an emotion that lasts 24 hours a day seven days a week until the plans are all finished and the holiday season over.

A close running emotion is anticipation which I'm sure you can see can be closely tied into uncertainty. Anyway losing weight or experiencing weight loss is but impossible unless these raw emotions are dealt with. It's real easy to be into emotional eating.

In fact you don't have to separate these emotions, you can pretty well lump them together. But the bigger question is, "OK, how can we isolate them and leave emotional eating out of the equation?" Can we actually lose weight over the holidays or should we just put weight loss on the back burner?

So what does one do with uncertainty? This is where you will find the weight loss experts totally in the dark as they never even think of that emotion. Sure, ask them what to do with boredom and they are replete with tons of advice such as:

1. call a friend

2. go exercise

3. have celery or some very low calorie vegetable to chew on

And if they actually thought about uncertainty, they'd probably give the same advice plus maybe things like:

1. Don't worry, it'll all work out.

2. Have faith in yourself.

Think about it. These and a hundred different other options boil down to one thing and that is "do something about uncertainty." Escape it, run away from it, convert it to something else.

It all makes perfect sense, right?

Maybe I can put a slightly different twist on uncertainty. Uncertainty is the result of:

1. being unsure of yourself.

2. being unsure of others and outside events.

3. Feeling out of control about circumstances.

And if we can not let it be that you're unsure of yourself and others, we will feel uncertain.

As opposed to denying it, trying to escape it, or convert it to something else (any one of which we might eventually do which leads to emotional eating) let's first acknowledge it and how we feel about it.

"I'm feeling uncertain and I dislike it or hate it."

Now if you can not let it be that you are uncertain or have control of everything, you'll do something about it and what you've been programmed since childhood to do about uncertainty eat. That's right, emotional eating. Not having faith in you or letting go of worry--no you'll grab a comfort food.

This is all because we resist uncertainty. When you allow you to feel uncertain, it disappears and you no longer have to use comfort foods to dilute it.

Ok, so let's just experience and feel uncertain. But it's not that easy. We've also been programmed since childhood to avoid boredom at all costs. Programs such as:

1. You shouldn't feel uncertain--everything will work out.

2. You should be in control.

You can make up your own lists of beliefs you have about uncertainty. It's these beliefs and attitudes that you have about uncertainty that make it difficult for you to feel and experience uncertainty.

The good news is that as soon as you allow you to experience uncertainty, it disappears, but as long as you resist it, you will have to do something about it such as emotional eating.

Let's take it to another level! Now if you can not let it be that you are uncertain and you munch, what are you eating?

Symbolically you are eating the planned event (the thing you lack control over).

Sure the end result with feeling and experiencing an emotion might be that you end up calling a friend to discuss your uncertainties, let go of worry and just trust in your ability to handle whatever happens or something else but it won't be to escape uncertainty, it'll be as a result trusting your ability to handle any situation that may arise.

Now if the end result is the same, you might ask why deal with uncertainty? It's because to be successful with uncertainty, it's important to acknowledge that you are diluting the emotion by emotionally eating your planned events. You then have an opportunity to move beyond "I have an eating problem" to "I have a problem when I'm uncertain of my plans working out as planned"

You are now directed to the stressor itself and can stop blaming your over weight condition on food. Plus when you actually experience uncertainty, it's gone and so is the need to dilute it.

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Richard Kuhns B.S.Ch.E., NGH certified, a prominent figure in the field of motivational thoughts with his best selling hypnosis and stress management cds at http://www.DStressDoc.com and http://www.PanicBusters.com.  His aim is to make it possible for anyone to eliminate emotional binge eating. For more information please visit http://www.dstressdoc.com/BingeEatingEbook.htm

Richard Kuhns B.S.Ch.E. NGH certified, a prominent figure in the field of weight management (overcoming emotional eating). His aim is to make it possible for anyone to manage habitual binge eating as well as emotional eating. For more information please click here or go to:  http://www.DStressDoc.com/CompulsiveEating.htm

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